New Perspective

I have not been sleeping well lately.  I've gotten this wretched thing called a c-pap machine which is supposed to help with sleep apnea.  Apparently I stop breathing on and off during the night.  Well, let me tell you, getting used to this machine has been quite the ordeal.  I am still struggling with it.  So needless to say, with the lack of sleep, I've been quite emotionally unstable and vulnerable   

Satan took advantage of this state in the beginning of the week.  He likes to go after us when we are at low points, easy targets.  I'm not even sure what triggered it, but I started to go down the "I'm so wretched, I've done so many terrible things, how can God love and forgive me road." again.  But this time, something different happened.  God stepped in with a new way of looking at it.  Yaay God!  My hero, my deliverer, the lover of my soul.  

Some background here:  I have a friend that has an even worse backstory than me.  Yet she never seems to let those sins of the past keep her chained and captive.  She sees the past as the past.  But not only that, she sees it through eyes of gratitude.  She sees it through God's eyes and mercy. I just didn't get it the way she did.  I often see my past as an ongoing, ever present condemnation and anchor to my present and future.  Anytime I think of it, it drags me down.  So, do you see the contrast here?  She sees it through God.  I see it through me.  Hmmm.  

And then God...So as I was wallowing and asking forgiveness for the thousandth time in the beginning of this week, God spoke a powerful thought to my heart.  He asked, "Why do you focus on what you have done instead of what I have done?  Why do you focus on your sin instead of my grace?"  Oh my goodness!  That is exactly what I've been doing for years and years and years.  Instead of being thankful and amazed at the grace and mercy showered on me, I focused on my own failures.  I made myself bigger than the forgiveness, the deliverance, the love and mercy of my Savior.  Did I think that if I continued to repent of those past sins I would be forgiven more?  Loved more?  I don't know.  Our Father doesn't forgive again.  He forgives once and for all.  Psalm 103:12 As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us.  Did part of me believe the Lord was bringing my sins back again?  He doesn't do that, He is the One who forgives us.  He is the One who delivers us.  He is the One who removes our sin. Romans 8:31-34 31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? 33 Who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us.  

Satan is the accuser of the brethren (that's you and me!)  Revelation 12:10 Then I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, “Now salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren, who accused them before our God day and night, has been cast down.  But it is God who justifies, redeems, forgives, loves and adopts us as His own.  Where sin abounded, grace abounded much more.  Romans 5:15  But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much more the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many.  Do you see this?  Grace abounds! 

So my message from God is this: Every time Satan brings up the ugly past, the sins of today, the stains that claimed our hearts and lives, we are to recall and celebrate the grace of God we have been shown.  The mercy we are given.  The love with which we are loved.  Instead of going down the road of guilt and shame again and again for the sins and failures that have been repented of, we need to take a new path down the lane of gratefulness and peace.  God's grace is bigger than anything we have or could do.  What joy for those of us who have been forgiven!  We need not wallow in the muddy pit of our past mistakes, but instead revel in the refreshing waters of forgiveness.  

Thank You Lord!  You are amazing and always showing us something new and beautiful.  I love You!  Let this truth reach into each of our hearts and settle there.  Let it secure our faith and grow the lovely fruit of salvation.  It's in our Redeemer's Name I pray.  Amen.