Forgiveness

Yesterday was a day of repentance.  The Lord called me on a few serious sins.  Yes, that's the word, SIN.  I was looking for a less harsh word, but truth is truth.  This correction was coming to me while I was out jogging yesterday.  And then, as I sat down to eat some breakfast I was playing a word game on my phone where you have to arrange the random letters to make words, well the letters spelled out the word "REPENT."  Could the good Lord have been any clearer than that!  LOL  The thing is I knew, deep in my heart that what I was doing was wrong, I knew the Lord wanted me to behave differently, but I made excuses, told myself justifications...I just buried the still, small voice under lies I was telling myself.

I misrepresented a situation to get what I wanted, to save some time and some money.  I really felt I had no other solution, no help with the situation so I basically  justified  lying because I was doing so much good. Perhaps we may as well throw stealing in there as well since, no matter how I justify it I used services I was not entitled to in this situation.  SIN

Not keeping my word.  My yes did not mean yes. John 5:37  But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.  I made an appointment and then didn't keep it.  This in and of itself was not wrong, but not calling to inform the other party as soon as possible was.  SIN

Being an un-peacer.  I know that's not a real word, but it fits.  Yesterday we talked about being a peacemaker and I realized there is a big part of my day where I am anything but.  My partner and I at work really care about getting things done right.  We want our building to succeed, and we want to give the best service to our customers.  We always discuss ways to improve our operations.  But I realized after the whole "being a peacemaker" question this week, that the way I was going about this was not peaceful.  It was geared towards criticizing instead of improving.  It was a "our way is better" mentality more than "how do we change this for a positive outcome" thinking.

Wow, what a bad day was yesterday.  Our heavenly Father was very strict with me...and as much as I didn't like looking at myself in this light, I know it's what I needed to see.  You see, I feel when the Lord starts really holding us to higher standards it's because He wants us to be so much more than we are for Him...He expects His children to come up to a higher level.  He's got bigger plans that require those higher standards.  My prayer is always to shine for Him, and since a lot of this was not done in secret, I looked just like the world to those around me instead of looking like the redeemed child of God that I am.  No matter how good my intentions were, I went about things in the wrong way and left God out of the equation.

I am so grateful that the Lord convicted me.  With all my heart I aspire to come up to a higher level of living for Him.  And I know this is part of the process.  I am also forever grateful that He has "He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west. (Psalm 103:12)  And hallelujah!  But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.  (1 John 1:9).  I have been forgiven!  I have been cleansed! Our sweet heavenly Father takes the sacrifice of our beautiful Savior Jesus and applies it to our account.  What a wonderful God we serve.

This was a hard entry to write.  I had to face my sins and instead of hiding them, I shared them here to let others know they don't have to hide, that forgiveness is always available, and that we can grow from our mistakes.

Lord, thank You for conviction, thank You forgiveness, and thank You for not leaving me the way I am.

Embrace the Lord's correction.